Travel Pants and Lack of Same

Why is it so hard to find a good pair of travel pants?
I have been to almost all the stores I can think of -- there's still MEC in Toronto but that's a commitment of half a day from here -- and there is nothing!

I want: lightweight fabric for tropics (you can wear silk long johns underneath them for cool climates), in a dark color so they won't show dirt (but khaki is okay except for green -- too 'military' and sends the wrong message), with pockets that don't 'slash' on your hips (this doesn't flatter men or women and should be banned) and with a zip pocket so I can open and close surreptitiously -- velcro screams! -- and no cargo pants -- those pockets just get in the way and are functionally useless, unless you want to look like a pack mule with droopy drawers, then fill them up.

Travel pants should be designed so that the cuffs can be drawn in at the ankle to keep bugs out when you are hiking, made from a quick-dry fabric so you can wade or rinse them out at night, and for heaven's sake, they should *have belt loops* so that you can hook on camera bags, etc with the added benefit that if the button goes, your pants stay up. They can zip off into shorts or not, but look stylish enough that in a pinch you can wear them to dinner and not look a total dweeb.

Rant over. I will keep looking but with only 3 weeks left till I leave, I have resigned myself to doing without. And if any outdoor clothing designer wants some suggestions, then email me.